I'm Overweight and My Boyfriend's Not. Big Freaking Deal | Love Sex - Yahoo! Shine

"I'm Overweight and My Boyfriend's Not. Big Freaking Deal | Love Sex - Yahoo! Shine: My boyfriend Ali is 5'10" with friendly blue eyes, a dimpled smile and a fit, muscular body. He's someone you'd expect to see with a really hot, thin woman...not an overweight girl like me.

We've been dating for 18 months, and wherever we go—whether we're walking hand in hand through the mall, airport or down the street in his hometown (Glasgow, Scotland) or mine (San Jose, California)—we get confused looks that say, He can do better than her!"

Tarotize: The Menopausal Witch Spread

I've been following Lisa Floyd for awhile now. I think she has solid, insightful advice on oracles and the Tarot, all very healing as well as direct. Not surprisingly, I've been experiencing synchronicities while reading her blog, including this link I found this morning when I went to check:Tarotize: The Menopausal Witch Spread. I haven't tried it yet but am looking forward to what this spread reveals. From her blog:

You call me a witch as if it's a bad thing..."

Writing about my own perimenopausal angst over on the Seer Pathways blog yesterday, I realised that someone needed to make a Tarot Spread about a woman's four ages. Because as my friend, Pip Miller, over at As You Wish, pointed out - the Moon has four phases, not three, and the stage that we enter during perimenopause is neither Mother nor Crone... It's Queen!

There is a Swedish word commonly used about menopausal women: klimakteriehäxa

It literally means menopausal witch and it's used as a put-down (no extra points for guessing that!), adding to the pain of women going through the change. I mean - could we be any more unsupported by society!? We're "past our prime" and have little value now that we can no longer bear children and patriarchy does not mince words on that one!

Beauty is the face of a younger woman. Every magazine cover tells us that much.

Yes, I do believe that menopause is a wake-up call to women who don't believe or are not aware that we still live in patriarchy and that very ancient power structures still determine our value as women. Hence it becomes our task to empower ourselves.

'My Boss Told Me My Hair and Makeup Were Holding Me Back' Jezebel.com

I realize in probably the "real world" this is absolutely true. I just can't relate; I've always avoided, or chosen, another path. Fortunately, where I live, combined with the job I have -- and the union -- I'm kept from ever having to experience this total bizarre bullshit. Also, I'm close to retirement and don't give a damn.

Rosalind Russell, His Girl Friday 1940

In many ways what Jezebel went through is for the reasons stated: getting ahead, and the corporate world rewards those who look the part. But another part of this is simply the game of control. I've had crummy jobs that paid minium wage or less, if you were in the food industry, since tips were considered part of your wages. I worked in places that held inspections. One chain restuaurant had us -- adults, mind you, -- line up while a female corporate executive walked up and down, making the most personal and rudest of comments about our hair, faces, looks, size, breasts, jewelry, make-up, you name it. I was told once by a male boss to "wear a bra" -- I was! -- and from then on he made it a point to have me stand off in a corner while he looked at my chest for five mintues to make sure I was wearing a bra. Oh I could go on but you get the picture.

My Boss Told Me My Hair and Makeup Were Holding Me Back

You're Either Too Skinny or Too Fat But You're Never Right...

Between the ages of 21 and now (58) my weight has varied a lot. I've been 100 lbs, I've been 220. Now I'm at an all right weight; my doctor is reasonable (maybe her being female has something to do with that, I don't know) and realizes that a post menopausal woman who's struggled with weight literally her entire life isn't, nor should be, 98 lbs. She'll be satisfied, as will I, if I lose between 15 and 20 pounds. I'm working on it and already have lost a few. I'm not "on a diet" but watch I don't overeat, eat small meals throughout the day, protein, lots of iced drinks and water, of course no sodas. Just basic "works for me" stuff.

So, I've been all these contrasting weights all my life, and no matter what my weight, someone, somewhere, always had a comment to make! Sometimes, even strangers! I was too skinny: what's wrong with me, I need to put on weight, I'd look better and would have boobs if I gained weight, etc. Or, I'm too fat, what's wrong with me, why don't I lose some weight, just use will power, etc.

Weight. Something others feel is perfectly acceptable to comment on, even if they don't know you (though whether they do or not is none of their business.) Weight. Something that is always, always, never good enough. If you were a size 20 and got down to a 12, not good enough. Someone else will come along and tell you, unasked, what they think of your weight. A size 5, too skinny, not good enough.

Now I feel pretty comfortable although I want to lose and that's my own business. I'm not depressed about it or beat myself up. And -- maybe this comes from age -- when someone does make a comment about my weight I say, politely, it's none of their business, and I ask them why they're concerned. That usually shuts them up, after a few stammerings about "just trying to help" and "concerned about your health," etc. Sometimes it's a "Wow, don't be so defensive." Feh. You brought it up.

I just remember that, no matter what weight I or you may be, there's always someone who thinks you're not the right weight. You can't satisfy everyone, and you shouldn't try to satisfy anyone, except yourself. :)

BBC News - Japan's women footballers irked by Olympic flight seating

BBC News - Japan's women footballers irked by Olympic flight seating

Members of Japan's women's football team have complained about having to fly economy class to the Olympics while the men's team were in business class.

The women, strong contenders for gold, flew premium economy to Paris. The men are not expected to win a medal.

The article notes that the agency responsible for the upgrade is the "Japan Football Assciation" and the seat upgrade for male players "was in recognition of their professional status..."

(Actress Louise Brooks) The Very Definition of “I Don’t Give A Damn…” I don't give a damn

I came across this article about the famous 1920s actress Louise Brooks on a blog called I Don't Give A Damn. The article is written by a guest blogger going by the name of Imogen. The Very Definition of “I Don’t Give A Damn…” I don't give a damn. And here's a YouTube slideshow I found for you to enjoy:

Love this!

I had been thinking of writing a long rambling post about that, but really this says it all. :-)

In Pursuit of my Inner Pin-up: What's Wrong With Our Bodies, Anyway?

Great post about the female body image and expectations, then and now:In Pursuit of my Inner Pin-up: What's Wrong With Our Bodies, Anyway?

A Definition

Thanks to Iggy on FB for this image!

The plastic surgery a model needs to look like Barbie. - Fashion Beauty on Shine

 One model (who has a great figure, even described by the writer as "Marilyn Monroe like") shows what she's have to do in order to look like the "ideal" Barbie. All these decades later, and Barbie is still a standard, for some: The plastic surgery a model needs to look like Barbie. - Fashion Beauty on Shine

(Speaking of Marilyn Monroe, a few weeks ago Bill Mahr on his show referred to Monroe as a "pie hole." I like Mahr but he has issues, dahlings, with women and weight. . .)

Girls' Shape Ups X F - Mary Jane - SKECHERS Official Site

Skechers is now targeting preschoolers and grade school girls with their shape up type shoes. Messaage: you're never too young to start obsessing about your body or feeling like a huge bag of dung for not having the right body image. They're $50.00 which is not even in the equation for a lot of families; these days, or, ever...

Girls' Shape Ups X F - Mary Jane - SKECHERS Official Site

1959 Ad for Little Girls

 I don't know what's creepier, the ad itself, the use of the word "squeal," the "lace lavished" design, the little girl's strappy, heeled sandals, or that it comes in "Christmas red." Christmas red?
(Thanks to Boing Boing for item.)

Pap Smears at Walgreens

Who needs Planned Parenthood when Walgreens can be your one stop shop for pap smears and mammograms?

Study: Women with large breasts are smarter - by Terrence Aym - Helium

Study: Women with large breasts are smarter - by Terrence Aym - Helium


Do we even want to go here?

Classic Taylor

"Nobody tells me who to love, or not to love, who to be seen with and who not to be seen with" ~ Elizabeth Taylor

Miscarry? You're a Murder Suspect

Georgia state representative Bobby Franklin has introduced a bill requiring police to treat women who've miscarried as murder suspects:

Franklin wants to create a Uterus Police to investigate miscarriages, and requires that any time a miscarriage occurs, whether in a hospital or without medical assistance, it must be reported and a fetal death certificate issued. If the cause of death is unknown, it must be investigated. If the woman can't tell how it happened, than those Uterus Police can ask family members and friends how it happened. Hospitals are required to keep records of anyone who has a spontaneous abortion and report it.

Joe. My. God.: GEORGIA: Wingnut GOP Rep Wants Police To Investigate All Miscarriages

Strange Obsessions: Mother Forces 5 yr old to get brows waxed

 This is very sad; an obsessed and clearly disconnected woman forces her five year old daughter to get her brows waxed for an upcoming beauty pageant. This clip is hard to watch; the child is crying and screaming. The mother doesn't care and says "They call them beauty pageants for a reason..." in defense of her actions.

Mad Henry Makow and Women in Jeans

Henry Makow, or "Mad" Makow, as I like to call him, is ... well, ... hmm. He's a pundit actively promoted by Jeff Rense, a Christian, but he's Jewish, he's the "inventor of the board game Scruples," he's a right wing, Illuminati fearing, paranoid bigot, homophobic and misogynistic male, stuck in a Twilight Zone version of the 1950s. His latest rant is an "annual update" about women in jeans. Every year he republishes his article Female Gender Confusion is in the Jeans,  with some tweaks.  It's funny, and would be even funnier, if it weren't for the fact Makow is serious, deadly so, and that he has fans. Admirers. Men, and women, who agree with him. Scary, that is. Be sure to read the comments after his post at his site; many are from women.


He opens with a quote from Deuteronomy, so that tells you something, then proceeds to enlighten us as to what it is about jean wearing women that is so wrong:

Jeans are a fitting feminist symbol. They are farm workers' and miners' clothes. Feminism is an invention of the central bankers who also created and financed the socialist and communist movements to control people.

Makow is an anti-Semite, and uses code words for Jew like "central bankers" a lot. One of his pet theories are that Jews, er, bankers, invented feminism to destroy men and take over the world.

Makow offers advice to men, warning them of jean wearing pinko commie lesbian feminist women:

Men, a woman wearing jeans is a red flag that you might be dealing with "GID" --"gender identity disorder." Her jeans are saying: "I don't want to be a woman. I don't want to look good for men. I fear and distrust men. I want male prerogatives. I want to look like a man. I want to be a man."

He weaves all this into Stalinist Illuminati take overs, you just have to read it to see for yourself. He ends with this:

There is nothing more beautiful than a women wearing a summer dress. I can still remember a young woman I saw five years ago wearing a frock. That's how powerful femininity is. Let's not let highly-paid pious feminist and lesbian "change agents" destroy it. It's time for real women to relegate jeans to garden or farm work.

Did he just say "frock?" I haven't heard that term since I was a kid when my grandmother used it, and I'm old!

Makow's website is savethemales.com. Yep, "save the males." Oy.

Need to add something to previous post...

I was just at the Cato website.  Really - these women are the plus sized models?  For some reason I feel angry and irritated again.

More of Mel's sick ranting

Oksana: What kind of a man is that? Hitting a woman when she’s holding a child in her hands? Breaking her teeth twice in the face! What kind of man is that?
Mel: Oh, you’re all angry now! You know what, you f* cking deserved it!

Possibly I am wrong, but when a man continues to insist that a woman deserved to be hit, most especially when that woman was holding his 8 month old daughter - there is no hope for him.

It is possible, as Mel says in at least one of the tapes, that Oksana is a "gold digger."  Let's look at the situation though, Mel is what -- 108 year old?  OK, maybe not quite that old, but you get my point.  Oksana is a beautiful young woman.  Now I am not saying a beautiful young woman can't fall in love with an older man (my SO is older than me by a decade), but did Mel not consider that possibility back before he got a woman pregnant?  You know, before he destroyed his marriage with his wife that had like 8 children with him?  If he was stupid enough to fall for a gold digger (and I am not saying she is) doesn't he hold most of the blame?  Shouldn't he have just looked in the mirror and thought about how he should proceed cautiously because not only is he old, but he is also a total asshole and most women would not want to be with him?  I think so.

Then of course there are the threats of murder -- what psycho rant would be complete without them?:

I’ll put you in a f *ckin rose garden you c*nt! You understand that? Because I’m capable of it. You understand that?

What a man, eh?  Nothing shows you are a man more than threatening a 95 lb woman.

One of my favorite weird things in these new tapes is that Mel claims to have left his wife, Robyn, not for Oksana, but because they had no "spiritual connection."  Ya know, because Mel is so spiritual.  Seriously, does he not get that he is sooooooooooo unspiritual that he could not possibly have a spiritual relationship with anyone or anything?

The best thing about these tapes is that he pretty much admitted to beating Oksana and knocking out her teeth (while she was holding his baby) so it should be very easy for him to be convicted of domestic violence there in CA.

Note:  I took those quotes from the text portion because the few clips I have heard on TV were too disturbing for me and I couldn't listen to the actual recording.